Saturday, July 25, 2015

Every Body Needs An Asshole, Trump Is Doing The Honors For The GOP.

The Joke... The parts of the body were fighting among themselves over who should be the boss. The brain said it should be the boss because it does all the thinking, the mouth said it should be the boss because it nourishes the body by eating, the hands said they should be, because they do all the work, and so it went on all day with each body part saying why they should be the boss.

The asshole said nothing... it just shut up and shut down, doing none of its work. Two days passed and things got a little uncomfortable. Four days passed and everyone felt quite bloated and were finding it much harder to function; stuff was piling up. By the seventh day the body parts were all screaming to get some relief, all the 'garbage' had piled up and it stunk so bad the body was ready to pass out. Then the asshole spoke up... he was unanimously elected to be the boss.

The Reality... Donald Trump is right now fulfilling that job of being the asshole in the 2016 Presidential elections. He is spewing all the crap that the Republican party and the GOP base wants to hear but all their candidates are too scared to say. The candidates are all willing to say crazy things but only one crazy can drive the Clown Bus at a time... so they won't all look crazy. By letting out all their little 'nuances' and secret dog whistling calls, Trump is forcing everyone to put up or shut up.

The problem the Republican candidates face is that they have nothing to put up as Trump has cornered the market in the insanity area. The inmates are indeed running the ward. He has taken all the nice soundbites that the Republican base has swooned over in past elections, and he is spewing all that garbage, which we have heard over and over for all these years and he has left none for the others to spew.

We have heard other assholes present themselves in the past, Christine O'donnell had to say that she was not a witch... the jury is still out on that, Ron Paul said women can stick some aspirin between their legs if they needed, Romney's Veep Candidate Paul Ryan had to distance himself from his buddy Todd Akin, when they revealed that they considered some types of rapes to be ligitimate... 'Paul Ryan says that he personally believes that rape is just another “method of conception” and not an excuse to allow abortions'... and don't get me started about Sarah Palin!!

Donald Trump has now spewed all the good stuff and we see the Republican hopefuls being left in the dust, quite rapidly I might add. This has awoken the GOP base and the other candidates are scrambling for anything they could now say to make themselves appear valid, sane, smart and compassionate... somethings they have never been known for.

The Donald has republican candidates trying to separate themselves from him and the statements which they have all used in the past, by attempting to tell the truth... enter Ted Cruz. 

Senator (Canadian) Ted Cruz is now proudly representing himself to be a Cuban, (ok he is now a Canadian Cuban...American) and says that he will bring Cuban festivities like pig roasts to the White House if elected. His latest brush with truth telling is to stab his Majority Leader Mitch McConnell in the back by admitting that McConnell is a liar, something the rest of the world knew all along.

Rick Santorum, famous for his 'man on dog' and other gay bashing comments over the years,  now admits to the world via a Rachel Maddow interview, that he does not know anything about LGBT people and if they are born that way. This is something he should at least spend some time thinking about since his decisions on the subject as President, would affect millions of Americans.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry, while under indictment and facing a felony charge, has tried to wear glasses in a blatant attempt to secede from his deserved reputation of being a blockhead...ooops. This act of distraction has not escaped the watchful and trained eye of the Donald as he has had plenty practice weeding out the goats from the sheep on 'The Apprentice.' The Donald recently sold him down the river for the scam he is trying to pull...of trying to look smart

I could run down the list of the other 200 or so republican candidates running for the 2016 Presidential elections, but I'll leave that for another time.

Trump is waving the same boring clueless 'build the bridge' flag as those before him and none of them or their base even realize that Mexicans know how to do many things... like picking, gardening, washing dishes, babysitting... and digging tunnels under walls!!... remember El Chapo? It is stupid to think there are no shovels in Mexico!

Regarding that assinine wall idea... there have been as many or more people coming into America through the airports for decades and simply overstaying their visas. President Reagan gave an amnesty and republicans hate him for this. There are also many who drive across from Canada, so to think that the Mexicans are the biggest immigration concern, simply shows the more racist aspect of republican logic... or lack thereof.

So hopefully, the asshole wins the Republican nomination!

I can't wait to see the debates!!

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  1. Yeah, this campaign season is going to be terrifying and a laugh riot. As for Reagan giving amnesty to illegals, its has been my experience that most conservatives, nearly all actually, either don't know he ever did such a thing and call me a liar. Alternatively, they have conveniently forgotten about the event. Truthfully I have no idea, I figure I would have a better chance understanding an extraterrestrial visitor to this planet who evolved on a different planet and whose culture and civilization were completely alien.

  2. And now it seems some of the other vital organs are trying to be the asshole (continuing the analogy from your post). The latest example is Mike Huckabee trying to out-asshole Trump "Obama marching Israel to the oven door" comments. It's like the GOP candidates are having a contest to see who can get the largest number of useful idiots all riled up. At the moment Huckabee is out in front.

  3. Hey guys, you got that right, the only man I feel sorry for at this point is Jon Stewart, because after Sarah Palin's entry yesterday in the mix beside the Donald, this would have been Jon's best, funniest and exciting year leading up to an election !! LMAO!